4 words: hood of his car
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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