someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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