if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
