Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
