Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
its liver damage thursday
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