That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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