It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
