In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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