Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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