there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
She even gives head with a lisp.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize