hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
