i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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