i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't