Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
