would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
