we have pet lesbian snakes
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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