Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
