Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize