we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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