we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Randomize
