I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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