why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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