It was confusing and full of hummus
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ladies don't puke and tell
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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