I skipped work to stalk him.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize
