You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize