Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Randomize