Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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