I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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