Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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