I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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