I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
