Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
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i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
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don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
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