The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize