you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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