I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
