I wanna bring you to show and tell
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.