dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
We are two peas in an std pod
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
