I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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