this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
