Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
wow bdsm is so cute
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
