she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
