i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
