She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
