Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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