my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
