have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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