No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
