I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize