how can u be prego again
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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