But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
